Archive for September, 2011

Old faces…

September 28, 2011

On Monday I had to go up to the high school after school for a training for the SAT and ACT.  I got there before they let out for the day, so I stood in the hallway so that I could see some of my old students.  Some of them walked by me with a look that basically said “WTF are you doing here?” while others ran toward me yelling out my name.  It was good getting to see some of my old students and I got to talk with several of them for a while.

After my meeting, I ran into some more students and they asked if I was going to the homecoming carnival that was later that evening.  I told them I would think about it.  I didn’t want to go by myself, so I started asking some of my friend that work there if they were going.  I got a hold of my friend Sandy and we decided to go together.

I met Sandy at her house before the carnival.  Now I must mention that I have Sandy’s daughter in my class; she had requested that she be put in my class.  Her daughter is new to my school and even though I have known Sandy, I had never met her daughter until school started and I had never been to her house.  I knocked on the door and Sandy’s daughter answered the door.  I said, “I just came by to check and see if you were doing your homework.”  She laughed and I went inside.  I’ll come back to this story later.

We went to the carnival and it was good.  This was the first year they had a carnival and I was impressed how much they had for the first time.  I got to see even more old students.  Both times I was up there that day I kind of felt like a celebrity.  Many of them were so excited to see me and I was glad to see most of them.

Sandy’s daughter must have told some people what I said to her at her house, because during her class period, a student asked, “Is it true that you go to students’ home to check and see if they are doing their homework?”  I just smiled.  Another student asked, “How do you know where we live?”  I said, “I can look that up, that’s the easy part.”

I love to mess with them like that.  And once again, I couldn’t make this stuff up.

-J

That just happened…

September 19, 2011

I would like to preface this by saying that this is a true story.  I promise that I am not making this up.  I don’t think I could if I tried.

Today a student asked a question.  I don’t exactly remember the question, because of how my response played out, but the question isn’t that important.  I started explaining about South Africa.  My students are terrible with geography so I began to draw a map.  My map of Africa looked something like this:

I think that is a pretty good rough sketch of Africa; I was quite proud of it.  I proceeded to draw South Africa on my map.

I immediately realized that I just drew a penis on the board in front of a class of 32 eighth graders.  My face turned bright red and I erased the picture immediately.  I walked to the back of the room and told the kids that we were off task and that we needed to move on.  I could hardly keep it together, I wanted to bust out laughing, but somehow managed to keep my composure.

I’m not quite sure how many kids noticed that I had just drawn a penis on the board (that would assume that they were paying attention to me).  There was also no giggling, which led me to believe the crisis was averted.

Later, I went to my principal and said, “I just want to let you know that if you get a phone call about me drawing a penis on the board in class, it is true, but it was an accident.”  She replied, “What are you teaching in your class?”  I explained it to her and she laughed and said, “I can’t wait to get that phone call.”

Like I said, I could make up this stuff if I tried.

-J

The things they say…

September 8, 2011

The other day, a student came into class while I was talking to another teacher.  He asked me, very loudly, “Is it legal for your parole officer to make you take a drug test at school?”  Normally, I can hold it together during things like this, but I lost it.  I could not help but laugh and replied, “I have no idea.  I have never had a parole officer.”

I’m sure this kid was on parole and I wonder if he was tested that day.  Based on the passion in his voice, I’m guessing he didn’t pass.

-J